My first trip to the Naturopath

SCARY!  Really I had no reason to be scared but something new is always a little intimidating.  Whats also intimidating is knowing your Naturopath is also a psychologist (EEK!)  You know how you’re never really aware of something until you’re in front of someone whose profession it is to analyze your every word, glance at you every time you fidget and write down everything you say?  Ya, scary.  It was going quite nicely until 5 whole minutes into my consultation he asks about my infertility (I marked it on my questionnaire as something I wanted help with) so obviously being the sound reasonable woman I am I burst into tears.  As if that’s not bad enough I started making jokes about my crying and emotional instability “hi, nice to meet you, I’m crying” or “OMG you think I’m CrAzY!”.  He was very calm and nice about the whole outburst (part of me wondered if he would run away panicking about the crying girl he just met in his office).  After my breakdown we discussed everything from skin issues to my relationship with my family.  It became apparent to me that I am a stressed out ball of frazzled CrAzY by listening to myself as I told him every thought that entered my brain and speaking without thinking, which I do constantly.  I’m not going to get into the dirty deets but I definitely had some interesting thoughts come up and maybe some ‘I see the light’ moments too.

He wanted to do a quick acupuncture sesh so I know how it feels and to try to relax me with our remaining time.  I lay on the bed gripping the edge, eyes as wide as saucers frozen in terror (sort of like a trip to the dentist for me) and poke poke poke poke done.  It hurt, for like half a second so it was totally bearable then he shut off the lights and told me to relax.

Relaxing went like this:

Ohhh it’s kind of itchy now

I’m not going to relax if it’s that itchy

Oh ok the itching is going away

What’s that smell?

Is something burning?

It keeps coming in wafts

Does acupuncture smell?

OMG I bet it’s toxins being released from my skin

That doesn’t make sense, maybe I should ask him

I shouldn’t ask him he already thinks I’m crazy

(Dr walks in “Everything ok? Are you relaxed?” “Uhhhm yep!”)

He for sure knows I’m not relaxed

I’ll google ‘does acupuncture smell’ when I get home

This for sure smells just sniff your damn hand

(10 mins of debating smelling my hand and actually seeing the needle in my skin)

Ok, smelled it, it’s not my skin

Maybe it’s my feet!  I bet it’s my feet

This carries on for another few minutes until the Dr comes back in and asks how it was.  Obviously I lie and say “good, I’m very relaxed now”.

So he gives (sells) me 2 bottles of drops one for acne the other for excema and we make an appointment for next week for a full acupuncture sesh.  I’m not going to say what the drops are since I have no idea if they will actually work and want to do a full review after a week on them.

Btw I googled acupuncture smell some say you can smell the patient and a burning smell is usually a diseased heart or liver.  I’m wondering now if there was something in the garbage can beside the bed…

 

 

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